green horn

Two weeks have passed since I began my 1-year internship program. So far, so good. Although I’m not yet convinced that I have made the right choice regarding the hospital I’m currently training in, I’m not convinced that I made the wrong choice either. For one, I’m thankful that I’ve been getting sleep during the 36-hour duties, and that the consultants and residents are all very accommodating. For the first time in my medical career, I got to see what it was like to have OR techs, ECG techs, instrument nurses and med techs. Before, in the God-forsaken hospital where I had my junior internship, we had to do these things. Which was unfair, because we are training to be doctors, not nurses or aides.

Anyway, I’m rather glad that I’m in different setting now. Although I miss my friends, there’s no way I’m giving up this post for a post in their hospital. I’m done with government hospitals overflowing with patients. You could argue that interns in those hospitals do get to do more procedures and more practice, but what is sorely lacking is the finer points of health care. From what I observe, having less patients allow doctors to look at each patient more closely and not to be hasty in administering the treatment plan. Also, in hospitals with better funding and equipment, there are more diagnostic tools at your disposal, and more treatment options. You could actually use the drug of choice and not have to make do with using this or that drug because it’s the only one available. Even if I’m still just a green horn in my present hospital, many doors are already opening for me and I’m getting to see and experience new things.

Will my opinion change after several weeks? Maybe. But at least I got to see and experience first-hand how it is in a different setting. Maybe I’ll regret choosing a relatively benign hospital over a toxic one, but at least I’ll have experience to back up that regret and not just advice from other people. Maybe I’ll ultimately abandon my plans of going abroad for my residency and decide to go back to a toxic hospital, or maybe I’ll push through with my original plan. For now I’ll take it one day at a time and make the best of my current situation. Ultimately, I think that being a good doctor is still largely due to the kind of person that you are. You have to know your strengths and weaknesses, and use this knowledge to choose the environment that will bring out the best in you. I hope I’m already in that environment.

written on 13 May 2005